17 days and counting

Well I put my song choices together and I'm really leaning towards an acoustic version of Lenny Kravitz's song "Thinking About You." Why? If there was one artist that I related to, it would be him. I love his style, his music, his depth and his sexiness. Oh, and his mind too. Lol.

I feel like I should be mum on what I'm doing to prepare because someone out there might steal my shit but honestly if it's going to be me, it's going to be me. That's leftover paranoia from a time far far back. Here are my thoughts on watching all of these contests. It's really about money. How much money can this artist make me? What is this artist's market audience? I have to sing a song that they can identify my market audience, type of artist and potential to earn in three minutes. I am ready to do that. I feel strong and yet I want to throw up. I find myself excited yet panicked.

I'm meeting with Pepper Jay and John Michael Ferrari tomorrow to help me pick my song. They have been instrumental in helping me build my confidence, work on my performance and vocal skills. I love them. They aren't caddy or flippant. In a business where money is everything, they seem to care about me. It's very rare to find that. What I've learned is that I still don't trust my choices even though this one feels right. That's why people have teams. From a person who has trust issues, I have learned to be open and to listen.

I wasn't going to have anyone come with me on my audition either but I really do think having support would help a sista' feel stronger. Duh. My favorite DB Hilary is going to come and hang out with me. I am going to get my son and maybe one of his friends to come also. I want him to see me make it. I don't have to do this alone. I think I wanted to do this alone at first because I don't want people to see me fail and I don't want to be rejected but that's old school behavior. I deserve love. I deserve support and I won't fail because I've already won. I'm living my dream. How many people can say that?